Gravity's been extra heavy on me lately

In existence, there are 4 forces: electromagnetism, strong force, weak force, and gravity. Out of these, strong force (aka movement, like how we extend our limbs) is the most powerful..in essence. But on the smallest and largest scales, gravity is the most flexible. It grows as mass does and dominates until every other force becomes insignificant. I strongly believe that the universe, existence, really, is uniform. As we take on more and more tasks, obligations, responsibilities, burdens- the pressure, the gravity depresses us to the core. It forces our faces to the ground 'til the skyscape's figment, and then we're just camels, dry fucking camels (Maybe they do that because of stress too. Deserts are pretty shitty.). But remember: strong force is named as such for a reason. It's solid and unwavering, patient 'til gravity slips up, and then it's all about momentum.

Giving up, we lose the chance to catch the lightest in life: the inspiration that keeps on inspiring.

Please,

anyone, just tell me that everything's going to be okay.

Company

I was dropped into my personality years ago and I've been trying to get out ever since.

Carrie Fisher is amazing.

So, uh..hmm

I won't be able to fall asleep for a couple hours, so I'll spend some time here. I'm tired of Facebook already, and Twitter limits the amount of text you can post. Myspace is fucked already. I'd watch Youtube, but it feels like I'm looking in on someone's life and I guess, admiring it, and that's very awkward. Pandora is my only internet constant nowadays. Discovering new artists, torrenting their albums and burning them, well, those are some of the things that get me going in the mornings. I have a ridiculously great Shins channel. Let's see.. Also on my shortcut bar is lomography.com which is very tempting at the moment, but I'm saving money. Laulima, Wiki, Onemanga, yadda.

Anyway, I'm taking a look at next semester's classes. I'm sticking to English until I graduate, but I haven't the slightest about what I'll minor in. Okay, here's what I'm hoping to take:

Understanding Photography*

English Composition II (I wasn't able to get into this during a previous semester)*

Argumentative Writing

Autobiographical Writing*

Japanese (whichever level I can qualify for; probably 301)*

Philosophy (deductive or inductive; I have no idea)

*most preferred

So I most likely will not take more than 4 courses. I've been having such difficulties balancing these 5 (one night class) and my job. I haven't had a single day off since the beginning of the semester and won't until the end of finals. I want to do something on Wednesday because school's off and I'm not scheduled for work, but I've got so much studying to do, and I really want to do well this time.

I know that all of this stress will be over once December hits, but fuck, it's going to take so much goddamn effort to earn the security of that satisfaction. I don't want to cringe when I see my transcript and regret the whole semester. I've got so much more work to do..

I'm gonna go lie down now.

Oh, and the Japanese part was a joke. I wasuru'd all my nihongo a long jikan ago.

Hello from home

Dear..

Where have you been?

I'd heard the lot of news

And then very little

But I'm not worried or anything,

Just wondering about you.

I dream you

On the ocean, on a sailboat,

On a sun splattered deck,

Aiming with a brush tipped teal,

Like a magnet-centered

Compass wheel.

Now!

Now this may seem sudden and as extreme at it's poles as I am as a whole but I've been so down for so long and haven't made much of anything of myself and I can't settle for that because there's so damn much outside to see and eyes to meet and it all may not be around by the time I make it so I'd best step out and soak up and breathe out and make it so!

?mm

I've been wanting to post something here for a while, but I've been stressed and out of focus for the past month or so. I'm struggling a great deal in school, and it's been tough keeping up a confident front toward it. I have to pass at least 10 quizzes at the psych lab by finals week, which means 3 a week to be safe. Half of me says I'm fucking screwed, but I say fuck that half and fuck the tests; I'm going to do this. Then there's an astro class that I feel stupid in. I've marked half of max points on 2 tests already. I wish I'd taken physics in high school.

I can't figure how to balance these two loads. How do I focus on two directions at once?

UPDATE: I figured out a psych quiz schedule: I need to pass 1 test on each Tuesday and Thursday, plus two quizzes every Wednesday until November 26th. If all goes according to plan, I'll actually catch up and be ahead of schedule before finals. Beating two due dates will earn me extra incentive points toward my grade.

17 quizzes at 50pts a piece equals 850pts - that'll get me a solid C

+50 incentive points makes 900pts - that'll get me a solid B

I'm throwing a ridiculous party when I pull this shit off.